Friday the 13th, Part VI: Jason Lives . Weekly Alibi . 11-24-97

Friday the 13th, Part VI: Jason Lives

DIRECTED BY: Tom McLoughlin

REVIEWED: 11-24-97

Yeesh! I thought parts III and V were bad until me and Emily watched this donkey-honker. Without a doubt the worst entry in the series, F13PTVI opens as Tommy Jarvis (remember, he's the guy who "killed" Jason in Part IV) and his pal Ron Palillo (you heard me right--Horshack from "Welcome Back Kotter") visit the cemetery where Jason is buried. After digging up the comfortably rotting and maggot-infested corpse of America's most misunderstood hero, Tommy gets all emotional and starts jabbing him in the chest with a wrought-iron fence post, which he leaves planted in the corpse. There's a sudden flash of lightning and--you guessed it--Jason lives! Thanks, Tommy, you stupid bastard. Jason makes short work of Ron Palillo, but unfortunately Tommy escapes and goes to tell the sheriff that--Jason lives! The sheriff doesn't buy it and locks Tommy up, but when the cast of "Saved by the Bell" (or so it seems) shows up, the sheriff's hot-pants daughter takes a shine to the little troublemaker and busts him out. This new batch of morons are on their way to Camp Crystal Lake (now known as "Camp Simple Green" or some damn thing--so folks can forget the evil!) to be counselors, and they confirm my suspicions that Jason is actually an avenging Angel of the Lord, sent to rid the earth of asswipes. This flick has nothing going for it--the killings are lame, the gore is minimal at best and, worst of all, there's absolutely no nudity! And to top things off, for a rotten, worm-eaten zombie, Jason has a really big ass! Man--how bad does it suck to be the guy who made the worst Friday the 13th movie? (Paramount)

--Scott Phillips

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