In 1984, Joe Dante directed Gremlins, and it was a huge
success. Then he followed it up with a sequel, and it too was
a huge success. Since then, he's directed such forgettable films
as The 'Burbs, Matinee and Innerspace, none of which
matched the quality or profit of the Gremlins one-two punch.
So maybe Dante thinks our memories are short enough for him to
get away with essentially updating Gremlins for the '90s.
He certainly makes a valiant effort with Small Soldiers,
treating it as an obvious homage to Gremlins (and thereby
himself)--actor Dick Miller plays pretty much the same character
in both movies, and the word "Gizmo" comes into frequent
play. But ultimately Small Soldiers--like so many summer
movies--tries to make up for its lack of depth or charm with lots
of noise and action. The results are mixed.
The film is set in the fictional town of Winslow Corners, Ohio.
We're introduced to Alan Abernathy (Gregory Smith), a teenager
who is left in charge of his dad's struggling toy store, The Inner
Child, for a few days. (Maybe the godawful name has something
to do with why the store is struggling.) Alan is a crafty lad,
as we soon learn when he convinces the store's delivery guy (Dick
Miller) to front him a few Commando Elite and Gorgonite action
figures to try to make the store a little money while his dad's
out of town. He soon realizes that these action figures aren't
like other toys. They move, read, make declarative sentences and
strive to beat the living crap out of each other. The militant
Commando Elite are programmed to destroy the peaceful Gorgonites.
The Gorgonites are programmed to hide and lose. Before long, the
shop is destroyed and all the action figures missing.
Meanwhile, in an attempt to add plausibility and make some sort
of statement at the same time, we see the forces behind the toys.
Dennis Leary plays Gil Mars, the sarcastic, fast-talking (ooh,
what a stretch) CEO for the Globotech Corporation who greenlights
the production of the toys. When his underlings protest the violent
nature of the toys' design, Mars quips, "It's not violence--it's
action!" Somehow (the explanation is hazy at best) Globotech
has access to microchips from the Department of Defense, hence
the toys' bloodthirsty disposition.
Back in the 'burbs, the Commando Elite have waged an all-out war
on Alan and the Gorgonites--who have formed an alliance--as well
as on Alan's love interest, Christy (Kirsten Dunst). The kids'
parents--including Phil Hartman as Christy's dad--eventually get
in on the action and lots of computer-
generated chaos ensues.
The action is fairly inventive, and the special effects are superb--regardless
of the fact that computer-generated images always look like just
that. When the Commando Elite fashion tanks and projectiles out
of household products and transform a gaggle of Barbie dolls into
Borg-like androids, the assault on the humans and Gorgonites is
inspired and hilarious. The filmmakers show remarkable restraint
by limiting the battlefield to one city block instead of the whole
universe (like in every other summer movie)--even so, the relentless
action wears thin after a while. This is partly due to the fairly
flat acting by the two teenage leads, but can also be credited
to sloppy writing. Most of the pop culture references fail (the
kids' favorite band is Led Zeppelin), and the action is sometimes
too over-the-top to be plausible. (Granted, the movie has an implausible
premise.)
Finally, after all the film's empty sentiments about corporate
greed and its effect on independent business, the entire cast
happily accepts for their damages and distress big fat checks
from Globotech. In a movie about toys that will make millions
of dollars in merchandising alone, perhaps those sentiments are
intentionally empty. Like last year's Christmas toys, Small
Soldiers is colorful, fun and entertaining for a while, but
all too quickly forgotten.
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