My mother put it somewhat differently than Mick Jagger, who observed, "You
can't always get what you want." My mother phrased the proposition, "Growing up
means learning not to want what you can't have." I doubt that mom ever took a
meeting with author Stephen McCauley, screenwriter Wendy Wasserstein or
director Nicholas Hytner, but their new picture, The Object of My
Affection, sure seems informed by the principle she drummed into my head
over and over when I was a child.
The narrative in The Object of My Affection concerns a young
New York social worker named Nina Borowski (Jennifer Aniston), who keeps
looking for love in all the wrong places. Nina's well-connected sister,
Constance Miller (Allison Janney), is determined to fix Nina up with a man of
wealth and influence. But Nina prefers her romance with pushy legal aid lawyer
Vince McBride (John Pankow). Or, at least, she claims to. It's interesting that
she won't agree to live with Vince. She does, however, rent out her spare
bedroom to gay schoolteacher George Hanson (Paul Rudd) after he is cruelly
dumped by his professor lover, Robert Joley (Tim Daly). And therein begin our
complications.
Nina is entirely comfortable with George's sexual orientation. She
even encourages him to feel free to bring any new boyfriends back to the
apartment. But he's nursing a broken heart, and as it happens, he and Nina end
up spending a lot of time together. Pretty soon, they come to think of
themselves as best friends, and that's where Nina loses her bearings. She likes
George so much that she wants him to be something he isn't, and when she learns
that George dated and even slept with a girl in high school, she begins to
nurse hopes that they can alchemize friendship into romance.
The Object of My Affection gets off to a shaky start. We
haven't a clue why George wants to move in with Nina, whom he has just met.
Yes, housing is expensive in New York, but even a schoolteacher's salary should
cover rent. Once they are sharing space, the script allows the roommates to
become far too personal far too quickly. There's no suggestion of even a
moment's initial wariness. At this point in the film, we fear we're headed for
an inversion of last year's Chasing Amy, where a straight guy falls for
a gay girl. And when the picture cuts to some lame comedy about the sex lives
of Nina's community center clients and a poke-in-the-ribs joke about the
Association of New York Mothers of Latino Lesbians, we prepare ourselves for
the worst.
But then, like a runner who stumbles at the starting gun and
staggers to the back of the pack while trying to gain her feet, The Object
of My Affection rights itself, settles into a briskly comfortable stride
and runs a strikingly commendable race. Lesser filmmakers would have settled
for fantasy or Sturm and Drang theatrics. Hytner and his team avoid both. The
main characters are fully realized, and we come to care for both of them.
Moreover, the picture handles its secondary characters with especially
agreeable skill. Constance's high-powered literary agent husband, Sidney (Alan
Alda), might have been just a name-dropping jerk. But we come to discover in
Sidney a core of decency and a non-judgmental affability that no doubt account
in significant part for his success. Likewise, other filmmakers might have
turned Vince into a villain. But despite his arrogance, Vince is forgiving and
fundamentally well-meaning. Perhaps most impressive of all is the work the
filmmakers do on Rodney Fraser (Nigel Hawthorne), an outwardly superior and
snotty drama critic. Rodney is indeed a cultural snob, but he's also a man of
profound vulnerability, considerable wisdom and, in his private life anyway,
astonishing compassion. Hollywood seldom bothers with such subtleties, but as a
result of them, I find this film an object of a great deal more of my affection
than I ever would have suspected.