What a difference a snigger makes. A couple years ago, the
concentration-camp drama Bent showed a quick, none-too-explicit gay
orgy scene. The movie was slapped with an NC-17 and subsequently doomed to
commercial oblivion. Yet in Austin Powers The Spy Who Shagged Me,
there's a lengthy gag predicated entirely on the appearance that Heather
Graham is fisting Mike Myers. Fisting, hell; she winds up pounding a tennis
racket up his bum. If the makers of Bent had even hinted at anything
like that, the movie would've been banished to some pit of darkest
iniquity--or worse, Cinemax.
But The Spy Who Shagged Me has a solid, upstanding PG-13,
and thanks to the good folks at the Motion Picture Association of America
(MPAA), kids will be reenacting the scene this summer at camps all over
America. Not to mention the most dick jokes ever heard outside a
urologists' convention. Not to mention even the title, which manages to
sneak a silly-sounding British vulgarity onto megaplex marquees. Don't
expect the Brits to return the favor and call it The Spy Who Fucked
Me.
This isn't to make some prudish point about the movie itself, which is,
if anything, even more tasteless than the original and funnier for it.
However, it does say something about the prudishness of our ratings
board--and by extension, us--that the MPAA penalizes serious, thoughtful
sexual content, even as it ushers in far more salacious material with a
wink and a giggle.
The idea, I suppose, is that a flash of actual sexuality is more
objectionable--obscene? titillating? inspiring?--than laugh-it-up innuendo,
however extreme. But when Mike Myers' mop-topped superstud struts past a
buffet table, butt-nekkid, with his ying-yang obscured by suspiciously
erect foodstuffs, does the MPAA think anyone past the age of 10 won't get
the joke? If the ratings board's aim is to protect the young'uns from
lewdness, it's shooing a single cow out of the gate while a herd of buffalo
tramples the fence.
Especially since The Spy Who Shagged Me gets its biggest laughs
thumbing its nose at the MPAA. In the sequel to the surprise 1997
blockbuster, Myers reprises his role as randy secret agent Powers, a groovy
British sex machine cryogenically frozen at max testosterone in the
swinging '60s. Thawed in the '90s with libido and velvet threads intact,
Powers is a POW from the sexual revolution. His nemesis, Dr. Evil (also
played by Myers)--who looks like Otto Preminger and sounds like Myers' old
SNL boss Lorne Michaels--figures that the key to Powers'
effectiveness is his sex drive, and he zips back in time 30 years to swipe
the studsicle's "mojo." Suddenly feeling less than shagadelic, Powers
enlists his female counterpart, Felicity Shagwell (Graham), to save the
world from laser death--and to help get back that lovin' feeling.
Myers, his cowriter Michael McCullers, and director Jay Roach thus zero
in on the myriad sexual hang-ups--castration anxiety, terror of commitment,
and squeamishness about the act itself--that underlie their chief
inspiration, the James Bond/Derek Flint superspy flicks of the '60s. I
mean, did anybody ever have more interrupted sex than James Bond? The
funniest running gags in Austin Powers carry this bewildering combo
of innuendo and modesty to its loony extreme. When Myers isn't prancing
naked behind oversized meat platters or unfurling Dr. Evil's awakening
libido to the strains of "Let's Get It On," he's finding ways to list every
penis euphemism ever coined without troubling a single censor. (One tactic:
visiting celebs named Willie and Woody.)
Better paced than the original, The Spy Who Shagged Me offers
plenty more belly laughs, from Rob Lowe's uncanny Robert Wagner imitation
to the identity of Dr. Evil's shelter company. There are also the expected
slow stretches, and Myers' Scottish routine is the biggest groaner since
Red Buttons' "Never got a dinner." But Myers' put-upon Dr. Evil, who gets
more screen time than one-joke Powers, dominates the film as surely as a
Blofeld, whether he's hashing out family woes on Jerry Springer or
using a global-attack scenario to stage a Great Santini psychodrama.
Nevertheless, what's funniest about Austin Powers: The Spy Who
Shagged Me is its knack for being filthy and innocent at the very same
time--just like Heather Graham's smile. In the '60s, when movies were
starting to stretch the bounds of screen sexuality, the Bond/Flint films
were a safe haven of leering without actual lust--something the Bond series
has maintained to this day. As a result, smirky Bond bagged more babes than
Wilt Chamberlain, yet coasted through the '70s without a single R rating;
meanwhile, the honest, adventuresome likes of Carnal Knowledge and
Last Tango in Paris fell prey to X's and obscenity hearings. Even
today, movies like Spike Lee's upcoming Summer of Sam and Lars von
Trier's The Idiots face the economic sanction of an NC-17 unless
they kowtow to the MPAA's demands. Few kids will get to see these, or would
ever want to. But it's nice of the ratings board to let The Spy Who
Shagged Me clue them in to things far worse than what they're
missing.