I was only 7 years old the last time I saw
The Avengers TV series, but I don't remember it sucking
in quite this fashion. The most striking thing about this super-spy
story is that there's nothing striking about it--it has absolutely
no salient characteristics. From the initial meeting of secret
agents John Steed (Ralph Fiennes) and Mrs. Emma Peel (Uma Thurman,
in a double role), through their encounters with super-villian
Sean Connery, through Connery's attempts to control the world
by controlling the weather, up to the final confrontation, every
moment has exactly the same sense of force. It's like listening
to a metronome while watching special effects: There's no more
excitement or suspense in the explosions than in the expository
dialogue. I can't say whether this movie was bad or good; it was
so consistently the same, and so full of distracting if unorginal
visuals, and slack but not painful dialogue, that seeing it was
like having no experience whatsoever. After its mercifully brief
90 minutes were over, I almost completely forgot what it was about.
--DiGiovanna
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