This isn't even bad in a fun way -- it's just bad. Let's look at the rap sheet: a middle-aged, blue-haired "punk" hacker who spouts madcap lines like "That's gotta hurt"; painfully loud gunfire made more excruciating by the generic techno-metal on the soundtrack; a completely gratuitous visit to a raunchy strip club; a minority sidekick/cypher who exists solely to sacrifice herself in a lame finale; and bald villains who crack macho one-liners after cracking people's skulls. Stay as far away from Universal Soldier as you can.
--Greg Petix
Full Length Reviews
 Universal Soldier: The Return 
Capsule Reviews
 Universal Soldier: The Return 
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